Tides of Change
by Lletya
Summary: Edward lives a mechanical life, content to remain alone. When Jasper makes an appearance and sees through his facade, will Edward remain in stagnated water or will he go with the tides of change? Edward & Jasper, Human
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I own nothing.**

An empty room. It had become a comforting sight to me over these last few years. No one to make small talk with, no one to put on that fake smile for. Though some may have found the silence uncomfortable, I welcomed it with open arms.

I wiped the table top with disgust. I never understood how people could be so messy when eating with utensils. Is that not the point of silverware? It doesn't matter though, I suppose. At the end of the day, it was my job to make sure that the diner was spotless, and I don't leave my work half done. Though I am often tempted to.

Cleaning is such tedious work that my mind tends to wander while my body takes part in the monotonous act. Today my thoughts had decided to bring up the failure that I insist on calling "my life."

I graduated high school with high honors and was accepted into a prestigious university with a full scholarship. Although, if you were to ask me now what the name of that school was, I could tell you with complete honesty that I do not remember. That's how little I cared for school.

My report card was atrocious. I wasn't aware that one could actually pull out a GPA of 0, but I indeed managed it. Not that I expected anything else since I skipped all but the first day of classes.

I didn't care. I had no motivation. I ignored my parents' pleas for me to do better, thinking that it was none of their business. And it really wasn't.

I instead went to a community college to appease the family, and earned my two year Associate's degree with fairly decent grades. I really did have every intention of continuing my education in a four year college, but…

"Edward, are you almost done?"

I sighed at the question. Such an inquiry irritated me greatly, and it could have been for a number of reasons. Perhaps it was because the one asking the question was standing at the cash register looking directly at me, and could therefore answer her own question. Then again, maybe it's because she was the owner's daughter and thought she also managed the diner.

Neither one of those reasons is true, and I'm well aware of that. I do like to delude myself on occasion.

You see, the reason Alice asked such a question of me is simple. As early as my first day of employment at this establishment, she had made it clear that she was hopelessly in love with me. Needless to say, her feelings were not reciprocated.

I wiped off the last table and turned to face her expectant gaze.

"Yes Alice, that was the last table," I said, trying not to sound too condescending. I picked up the bucket of dirty dishes and took them into the kitchen. On my way there I noticed that Alice had not gained any subtlety as of late and brushed my arm as I walked past. I ignored her, as this had become commonplace when we were alone, and continued on to place the dishes in the sink.

"Why did you start cleaning up so early anyway?" Alice asked, throwing her jet black hair behind her shoulder in some kind of overly exaggerated hair flip. "There's still half an hour until we close."

"It's not like anyone comes in this late anyway," I responded casually, trying not to let any of my irritation show.

"Well then, what do you want to do since you're done with your work and we're all alone?"

Alice tried so hard to be seductive. Honestly, she had a nice body and I'm sure most men would be falling all over her. But one of these days I'm going to lose it and tell her that she does nothing for me. Absolutely nothing.

"I was going to do the dishes for Felix so he wouldn't have to worry about them in the morning," I replied nonchalantly. At this point, I'd do anything to get away from her.

I ignored her murmurs of discontent, only vaguely hearing something about "boring ass employees" and "not knowing what he's missing."

I always found Felix's work station fascinating. The sink was positioned directly under a window, and this particular window offered the most spectacular view. Even in the darkness I could make out the soft ripples of water from the lake below. The weeping willows surrounded the lake in an almost protective stance, creating a scene I could not even conjure up in my wildest imagination.

But at the same time, there was something almost… sad about the scene. During the day, I had looked out over the same landscape and I was able to make out every detail that was currently hidden from me. The willow trees were grand, but there was an air of despair about them, as if they had lost something. It almost seemed like the trees were mourning a loss, and the lake was merely a collection of their tears.

I could not help but feel as if these trees were weeping for me. My life was a joke. I considered myself to be a classic example of one who is not living, but merely alive. I went through the daily motions of work, eat, and sleep. When my shift at the diner was over, I would go home, eat dinner, and watch TV until I feel asleep. When I woke in the morning, I would prepare for work and head to the diner.

Such was my life for the last three years. I had no friends. I didn't want any. I never did see the point in "friendship." I didn't long for others' company the way so many people did. I was content being left alone. I was content without the company of friends or family.

I was not, however, content with the current state of my life. I didn't want to be working at a diner. The owners were kind people, but this simply was not what I had imagined as a career for myself. Truth be told, I didn't have the slightest clue as to what I actually wanted to do. I didn't even know where to start. So I settled for the comfortable routine I had fallen into here.

My phone vibrated in my front pocket and I was actually thankful for the distraction. My thoughts had a way of overcoming me when I was left alone with them. I looked at my phone to see a new text message from Emmett.

Emmett was perhaps the closest thing I had to a friend. He lived in the apartment next to mine, and made it a point to try and talk to me. He was a nice enough guy, and my opposite in every way. He was buff. I was almost certain he rented his apartment for show and slept at the gym. He was outgoing, more so than I felt any human being should be. He was… likeable, for lack of a better word.

I'm not terribly scrawny, though to say I'm muscular would be stretching the truth quite a bit. My bronze hair could not be styled even if you threatened it with a lit match. My eyes were my only feature that ever received compliments, and I didn't really understand where the compliments came from. When I looked in the mirror, I saw normal looking green eyes.

And I'm not… likeable. I didn't make any effort to talk to people or make them feel at home the way Emmett did. I could say I envied him. Not for his social life, but rather for the _ability_ to be social. It's something I always wished I had.

I returned my attention to the text message. Emmett asked if I would go to a party with him later that night. He had been asking me for some time, but my answer remained the same. Tonight was even easier than usual to decline, as it was Thursday and I had to work tomorrow. I relayed this information to him and put my phone back in my pocket.

As I continued washing the dishes, I heard the soft jingle of the wind chimes near the door. Slightly annoyed by such a late night visitor, I turned around to see who would be walking into a diner this close to closing.

It wasn't the silky blond hair that cascaded over his face that caused me to stare. It also had nothing to do with the way his clothes hugged his body in just the right places.

It was the look in his eyes. The two deep pools of blue looked curiously around the establishment, making him seem as if he were a child trying to make sense of his surroundings. But he didn't appear terribly interested in the decor. He seemed to trying to make sense of something I could not see.

His eyes finally turned upon me, and it was all I could do to avoid flinching under such a powerful gaze. He didn't appear to be looking at me. He seemed to be looking into me. I felt as if everything I had ever done in my life, both the good and the bad, were clear to him in this very moment.

I shifted my eyes ever so slightly to avoid collapsing under the strain of his scrutiny and noticed a motorcycle helmet under his arm. He wore a leather jacket, completing his biker look fully. I momentarily allowed myself to fantasize about owning a motorcycle and riding through the open road without a care.

I quickly reminded myself that he was a customer and that I had a job to do. I began walking over to the cash register when Alice pushed past me.

Leave it to her to only work when she took an interest in the customer. I sighed and stepped back to the sink. But I had no intention of continuing on with the dishes. I turned to look out the window and waited to hear the voice of the mysterious creature that wandered in on such an uneventful night.

"Well hello there," Alive practically purred, in what she probably thought was her most seductive voice. It wasn't seductive. Not even close.

"Howdy, ma'am," the man replied, tipping his invisible hat to her. I nearly fell over at the southern accent. I always was a sucker for that. I thanked the calming effect that the view outside the window had on me. Without it, I'm sure I would've actually fallen over or made a fool out of myself in some other way.

I looked at the man out of the corner of my eye and was rather intrigued by what I now saw. When Alice had first arrived at the cash register, he had given her the same penetrating gaze he had given me, but that was now replaced by a look of… indifference? It didn't really appear that he was indifferent, but his eyes no longer seemed to be looking into the very depths of your soul. They appeared almost normal now.

He looked over the menu while Alice continued to engage him in small talk. From their conversation, I learned that he grew up in Texas but lived here in Washington. He was returning from a cross country trip and this was his last stop before heading home.

I found myself anxious to learn more about him. Which was strange, considering that the last time I felt this way about someone was… never. I didn't really care about the lives of others and didn't understand the need some people had to announce each and every little detail about themselves to the world. And yet I found myself hanging on to this man's every word.

I had to stifle a laugh when I heard him ask for the kid's pizza. I usually ridiculed adults that ordered food from the kid's menu, but he just looked so adorable when he asked for it.

Alice handed me the order slip and I was relieved that his order was a relatively simple one. I wasn't sure if I was up to anything complicated this close to the end of my shift. In fact, I'd normally be incessantly whining about people who come to a diner near closing time and expect to get served. I found that I didn't mind cooking for this man at all.

Alice turned and walked over to the register to continue her discussion with the man. I looked out the window once more, never tiring of the effect such a scene had on me. As I turned toward the oven, the man's eyes caught mine and for that brief moment, the penetrating gaze had returned. It was as if he was searching for something within me that he had yet to find. I shuddered slightly and busied myself preparing his meal.

I stood by the oven, lost in my thoughts until I heard the familiar beeping sound, indicating that the food was ready. I removed the pizza from the oven and had the fleeting thought to arrange the pepperonis into a smiley face. I chuckled quietly at my own ridiculous idea and simply placed the pizza as is onto the plate.

As I neared the front to serve the man, Alice quickly swiped the dish from my hands and set it on the counter in front of him. She then proceeded to continue her conversation, though it was now one sided.

He looked even more adorable than he had before as he eyed the pizza with absolute delight. He seemed to take pleasure in the smallest things, something I had always wished I was capable of.

I returned to the food preparation area to ensure that the place was thoroughly cleaned up and then proceeded to finish the dishes.

Satisfied with the state of the kitchen, I went to the cash register and sat down, pretending to be busy so that the man would not feel rushed. Alice shot me a dirty look, and I wondered what she could possibly be so angry about. Her conversation had been one sided for ten minutes now while the man ate.

Just as I was about to say something to her, her phone rang. She picked up the cell phone and when her mother asked her where she was, she sounded like the epitome of a teenage girl. She asked why her mother needed to know, told her it was none of her business, and so on and so forth. The man and I both tried unsuccessfully to contain our laughter and Alice quickly fled outside upon realizing this.

Upon finishing his meal, the man stood up and picked up his jacket from the seat next to him. I took his dishes to the sink and decided that Felix could deal with a bit of dish washing, especially since I did the majority of his work for him.

I came back to the cash register as the man reached for his wallet and pulled out enough cash to cover his meal. He left a generous tip and turned toward the door. I was still working the register when I heard him speak.

"That's a breathtaking view out that window isn't it?"

My head jerked up instantly, although it took me a moment to realize that he was indeed speaking to me. He was leaning against the counter looking at the door. I tried unsuccessfully to come up with a response before he continued.

"The one you were looking out of from the kitchen I mean," he said, now turning to look directly into my eyes. His gaze was now more powerful than it had been before. But I could see the hint of something behind that gaze. I wanted to say it was sadness, but I don't believe that a creature as magnificent as this would be harboring such an emotion.

"It is. The calming effect it has on me is like nothing I've ever experienced," I told him. I was slightly taken aback by the fact that I told him that. It was as if I'd revealed a secret meant to remain between the lake and myself. I peered through the window at the scene we discussed.

Something was different. Even in the darkness I could see ripples forming on the surface of the lake. As far back as I could remember the lake had always remained perfectly still. But now, the water had begun moving, and the ripples only grew stronger as I continued to watch the magnificent scene.

"Why do you look at it with such hopelessness? It doesn't suit you."

I turned to look at him, only vaguely aware that my gaze had shifted to the window. I didn't understand what he was getting at. I'm not hopeless, I'm perfectly content. Mostly.

As if reading my thoughts, he held my gaze and said "There's a difference between being content and being happy. I can tell that you think you're content with your life, but I don't think you're happy. And maybe the look in your eyes is because ya don't think you can really be happy. But that ain't true."

I couldn't speak right now even if I wanted to. How could this man, who I had exchanged no more than a few words with, see so deeply into my soul? How can he possibly know so much about who I am?

He sighed. "Chase what makes ya happy. Eyes like those shouldn't be marred by sadness. Life's too short to just let it pass ya by."

He finally turned to pick up his helmet and then exited the diner without looking back. I continued to stare at the door, unsure what to make of the situation. Of one thing I could be certain; something had changed.

A few minutes later Alice walked in yelling about parents and curfews. She started picking up her things and readied the diner for closing. Right before she left, she handed me a folded piece of paper.

"Here, that guy gave it to me and asked me to give it to you."

"What is it?"

"How should I know? It was too dark outside to read." And with that, she went through the door.

I chuckled at the fact that she tried to read it and felt no shame about admitting it. I opened the piece of paper to see what this mysterious man had written for me.

Under the brief message was his phone number.

"_**Chase what makes you happy. And if you need someone to chase it with you, I'll be there.**_

_**Jasper Whitlock"**_


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I own nothing.**

I set my cup of coffee down on the center table and looked out the window of my apartment. As usual, the sky was overcast and threatened the city with a downpour. I sighed and picked up the coffee once more.

Sunday mornings were always very relaxing for me. I didn't have work today so I decided to spend the morning lounging around. I looked back at the TV but didn't even try to make sense of the scene playing out. I hadn't been paying attention at all since I had turned it on.

No, the TV wasn't what held my interest right now. When I'm working, it's easy for me to clear my mind and focus on the task at hand. But now that I find myself with nothing of interest to focus on, my thoughts drifted back to the mysterious man from the diner.

Jasper, I believe his name was. Who was he? How did he know so much about me? Should I call him? I kept the piece of paper he gave me on the nightstand next to my bed. I read and re-read the note but I still wasn't sure what to do with it.

Thinking about what he said, he was completely right about everything. I truly wasn't living and I just wasn't happy with that anymore. But what could I do now? This had been my life for as long as I could remember.

I knew better than to leave myself to sit idly at the hands of my thoughts, so I decided to go for a walk. The threat of rain was ever present, so I didn't let that deter me. I put a rain jacket on just in case, and left my apartment.

I walked past Emmett's door and noticed it was open. I knocked before opening it slightly, and saw an obviously hung over Emmett lying on the floor.

"Ah fuck, the light! It burns!" Even in his current state, the joviality of his tone was evident.

"Do you need help?" I asked, only slightly concerned. This was definitely not the first time I had seen him like this.

"Nah man I'm good," he replied as he pushed himself off of the ground with much more effort than should have been required. He slowly walked over to the open door and leaned against the wall. "You know, you should try going to a party sometime. It can't be fun doing nothing but working all the time. Live a little, Eddie."

Normally it would have been easy for me to brush off his comment and move on, perhaps even reply with a witty retort of my own. But his last sentence hit a nerve.

I muttered something along the lines of "I have to go" and quickly made my way toward the park next to my apartment complex. Emmett called behind me, but I needed to get away from here. I needed to get away from everything.

As I reached the park, I decided that I needed more than just a walk. I started jogging on the sidewalk that wound around the grassy area. The area was deserted, most likely due to the weather.

As if on cue, a slight drizzle began. It wasn't nearly enough to be a concern for me so I continued on the trail, doing my best to avoid getting lost in my thoughts.

My concentration on the task at hand was so intense that I barely noticed the drizzle turning into a torrential downpour. I looked up and noticed that there were barely any clouds in the sky.

_Strange weather. The sky was full of clouds earlier but there was no rain. Now the sky is mostly clear and it's pouring._

I caught the figure of a man in my peripheral vision and slowed down to get a better look at him. I nearly stumbled over my own feet when I noticed who it was.

_Jasper. _

He stood with his back turned to me and stared at the sky, completely motionless. My mind was urging me to move forward and say something to him but my body wouldn't comply. Suddenly, he turned around and looked directly at me as if he knew I was there. He smiled and the penetrating gaze that he first had was replaced by one of compassion.

"They say rain is a symbol of change," he said as he walked toward me. The pouring rain didn't seem to faze him at all as he now stood inches away from me. He cocked his head to the side but didn't take his vibrant blue eyes off of mine.

"Have you thought about my offer?"

I felt my breath hitch and I couldn't get my thoughts to stop racing. This man did things to me that no one has ever done to me before. It took every ounce of concentration I possessed to form a coherent sentence.

"W-who are you?" I managed to stammer out. I hadn't realized how cold it was starting to get and I began shivering. Noticing my predicament, Jasper took my hand and pulled me over to the side of a nearby building that provided shelter from the rain.

The feeling of his hand in mine was… incredible. I can honestly say that nothing in my life had ever felt like this. Despite how cold he must have been as well, it felt as if my hand in his ignited a flame that warmed my entire body. I didn't want him to let go, but he did once we were out of the rain.

He gave me a confused look. "My name's Jasper. I thought I wrote that on the note."

"You did. I mean _who _are you? How can you possibly know so much about me?" At this point I was trying to hide the exasperation in my voice, but this man was driving me crazy.

"Do you believe that the eyes are the windows to the soul?"

I can't see how this question is relevant, but I nod my head.

"As do I. And your eyes tell me that you are unhappy with your life. You seek change, but don't know how to find it. It's possible that you even fear it. Am I right?"

My breathing fully stopped and I simply stared at him. This man has figured out about me something that I myself have yet to fully comprehend. I must have lost my balance because the next thing I knew, Jasper was by my side with his arm around my waist. He slowly pulled me up and asked if I was alright.

"Y-yes. You are right, I mean." He let go of me and stood directly in front of me, his silence urging me to continue.

'I don't… I'm not happy with my life. But this is all I've known. I'm comfortable." I should have felt apprehensive about sharing such personal details with a stranger, but for some reason I felt completely comfortable with him.

"Life begins at the end of your comfort zone," came his insightful reply.

This caused me to chuckle. "You really like quoting people don't you?"

His face lit up in the most beautiful smile I had ever seen. I felt honored to even be in such a creature's presence.

"That I do," he told me as he gaze shifted back to the park. "Looks like the rain has stopped."

I looked back at the outside world I had forgotten. The trees glistened with the droplets of water that now sat upon them. The grass shimmered as the sun's rays were reflected in every direction. The landscape surrounding us was simply breathtaking.

"It's beautiful," Jasper said, his words echoing my thoughts. "These are the moments that make my travels worth it."

Jasper began to describe the various sights he'd seen during his recent trip, and I found myself hanging on to his every word. I truly wished that I could see the beauty in the world as he could.

He was silent for a moment before asking, "Would you go?"

"Where?"

He sighed and shifted his gaze back to me. "Would you go on such a trip? If not for the beauty of the world, then for the change it can bring about in you?"

The intensity of his eyes unnerved me for a moment and I looked at the ground. "I don't know where I'd go. Travelling hasn't really been something of interest to me before, but the way you described it, it's now something I'd like to consider."

I answered him honestly. His description of the world through his eyes made me want to go out and see if for myself. I wasn't sure what he meant by the "change it can bring" so I didn't answer that question.

"You would go wherever your heart takes you. You don't need a plan."

I looked up at him, his eyes still remaining on me. "I don't know where my heart wants to go."

His breathtaking smile had returned, and he moved until there was almost no space between us. "Come with me then."

I wasn't sure that I had heard him correctly. "What?" I asked, my voice barely a whisper.

"Let's leave this place. We can go wherever our hearts take us. And when your heart decides where it wants to be, then you can go there."

I was stunned by his words. I momentarily considered refusing his proposition, but I didn't know that any part of me truly wanted to reject him.

"But… where? And for how long? I would have to…" I trailed off, trying to come up with some reason to decline his offer.

"There's no need to worry about the details. We'll come home when we're ready."

My heart fluttered at his words. The prospect of "us" coming "home" triggered something strange inside of me.

I put my arms around Jasper's neck and held him tight for a moment. Once I realized what I had done, I tried to pull my arms back but he quickly moved his own arms around my waste. We stayed in this intimate position for what seemed like ages, and it was truly the most amazing experience I'd ever had.

When he finally pulled away, he looked at me with a smile that could have illuminated even the darkest of nights. "Is that a 'yes' then?"

Unable to speak, I nodded.

"Would this be a good time to ask for your name?"

I coughed several times at the realization that I had never actually told him my name. "Edward," I managed to croak out between coughs.

Once I had my violent bout of coughing under control, I looked up at him and asked "So um… when do you want to go?"

"Whenever ya want."

His answer brought up several more questions but I settled on one. "Why?"

"Why what?" he asked, watching me expectantly.

"Why are you doing this for me? We've only known each other for a few days."

For the first time since I've met him, he looked away slightly and frowned. "Does it matter?"

"I guess not." I wasn't going to ruin the moment by pushing for an answer he obviously didn't want to give, though his reasoning for that was unclear. It seemed like an innocent enough question. "Can we leave tomorrow then?"

I was floored by my abrupt decision. When I was behaving like the normal, rational adult that I was, I would have waited a couple weeks at least. But something about living in the moment seemed to work for Jasper, and I wanted to know what that felt like.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," I answered, again without even a second thought. I knew that the longer I had to think about it, the more likely I was to change my mind. I didn't want to give up what could possibly be the most important journey in my life.

"I'll pick you up tomorrow morning then." He gave me one last smile before walking away. He seemed to have a spring in his step, but I wasn't naive enough to think that I was the one that put it there.

I walked over to the park's sidewalk and headed down the path back to my apartment. I didn't know what to think about today's events, so I settled for thinking about what had to be done before I left tomorrow.

I would need to let the Cullens know that I wouldn't be coming in to work for a while. Shit, I didn't even know if they would let me take a break, especially since I didn't know when I would be back.

I quickly pulled out my phone and called Esme.

"Hello, Edward," came her cheerful greeting. She was a kind woman, and I hated having to leave on such short notice. I don't usually care for someone's feelings, but she and her husband have been nothing but kind to me.

"Hello Mrs. Cullen. I'm really sorry to ask you this on such short notice, but would it be alright if I took a bit of an extended vacation starting tomorrow? I don't know when I'll be back but it's really very important to me…" I purposely left out the true nature of the "vacation" but I didn't lie. I honestly felt as if this trip would be life changing. If this was going to be a problem, I could always just quit, although I'd much rather avoid that.

"Of course dear!" She almost sounded happy that I was leaving. "In the three years that you've worked for us you've never once asked for time off before. I'm glad that you're taking a break. Don't you worry, we'll be just fine here. Enjoy your vacation!"

I hung up the phone with a mumbled "thank you" and found myself rushing back to my apartment. I hadn't felt this energized in years.

I ran past Emmett's open apartment door and stopped when I heard him call for me.

"Holy shit Ed I don't think I've ever seen you… well, excited!" he practically yelled as he came to the door.

I was so excited that I couldn't even manage to stop the goofy grin that spread across my face. "I am excited, Em. Things are finally gonna start to change."

I quickly went into my apartment and sat down for a moment. The truth in the last sentence I had spoken to Emmett was finally settling in.

_Things are going to change. I'm going to make sure of it. And Jasper will be there with me._

I started to pack my bags when I realized that I didn't really know how much I would need to pack. I decided to take Jasper's advice and refused to worry about details. I packed enough clothes for two weeks and was suddenly thankful that Jasper was going to be taking his car instead of his motorcycle. Though I was initially upset that I wouldn't get to ride on it.

Sleep didn't come easy that night but I eventually dozed off.

I woke to the sound of my phone indicating a text message. Jasper was letting me know that he would be over to pick me up in a couple of hours. I nearly jumped out of bed, fully energized once again at the prospect of what was to come.

I went through my morning routine and had a big breakfast, and by the time I was done it was about time for Jasper to show up.

I picked up my bag full of clothes and other supplies and walked outside. I only had to wait about two minutes before Jasper showed up in a gorgeous red convertible. Easily the next best thing to the motorcycle.

_Leave it to Jasper to travel in style._

He got out of the car and loaded my bag into the trunk. I got into the passenger seat while Jasper got into his. He took off his sunglasses and gave me an incredible smile.

"Are ya ready Edward? This is the beginning of the rest of your life."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I own nothing.**

As Jasper started his car, my mind was full of anticipation for what was to come. I had never actually been on a road trip before.

I remembered back in college when going on a road trip was the "cool" thing to do. It seemed as if that was the only vacation option for some people. I preferred the solitude of my dorm room. Luckily, we weren't actually forced to leave for breaks.

As we turned out of the apartment complex and hit the road, I looked over at Jasper from the corner of my eye. He seemed so relaxed, a stark contrast to the anticipation I was feeling. It was as if he had done this hundreds of times before. Maybe he had.

"Hey Jasper," I began, not actually sure of what I wanted to say next.

"What's up?"

"Where are we going?" I blurted out. Well, it was as good a question as any. I looked around to see if I recognized any of the stores or landmarks we were passing. I quickly gave up when I remembered that I almost never went anywhere that wasn't the diner.

"Where do you want to go?"

"I told you, I don't really know. I haven't ever been…" I stopped myself before I embarrassed myself even further. Telling Jasper that I haven't been outside of the state before probably wouldn't impress him very much.

"Have you ever been to the beach before?" Jasper asked, glancing at me for a brief moment before returning his eyes to the road.

I decided against lying to him. Even if I wasn't about to come right out and say I've never actually been anywhere, I'd answer his questions truthfully.

"Um, no I haven't."

"Do ya wanna go?" I could see his lips starting to quirk up into a smile.

"Sure I guess, but I don't think there are any good beaches here." I didn't actually know anything about the beaches in Washington, but both the prospect of seeing Jasper shirtless and being shirtless in front of Jasper made me somewhat anxious.

"We're not gonna go to a beach here Eddie." I cringed internally at his use of that nickname. I hated being called Eddie, but I decided I'd let it slide for now.

I looked at him questioningly, and I saw his brow furrow when he looked back at me again.

"Sorry, do you not like being called Eddie?" He asked as he once again returned his attention to his driving. "Edward it is then. I wanted to go to a beach in California, we should be able to get there by tomorrow night. Is that alright with you?"

This man just continued to amaze me. I didn't make a single indication of my dislike for that nickname, but from a quick glance in my direction he was able to pick up exactly what I was feeling. Though I wasn't about to tell him this yet, I would gladly follow him anywhere.

"Sure, that sounds fine." I looked down at my lap, unsure of what to say next. If there was an award for creating the most awkward silences in any given conversation, I would win it hands down.

"Hey Edward, tell me about yourself."

My breathing nearly stopped at his innocent question. My life up to this point truly was the definition of boring. I had no idea what to tell him.

"I… um… well," Great. I couldn't even manage to stammer out a sentence.

"It's alright if you don't wanna talk about it, Edward. We can turn some music on, instead," Jasper said as he reached for the radio control.

"Wait, no it's just… um, can you go first?" I could feel my face turning red now. I was secretly hoping that his life would be just as boring as mine, but I already knew that wasn't the case.

"Well, what do you want to know?"

"What do you do for a living?" I hoped he wasn't planning on returning the question. I didn't really want to tell him that I worked in a diner. I mean, sure he already knew that, but I didn't want to actually come out and say it.

"I don't." He responded simply.

"What?"

"I don't work. When I was a child, my parents were murdered in their sleep by burglars. When I woke up that morning, I found them lying in pools of blood in their bed. I don't really know why they didn't kill me too.

I felt tears welling up in my eyes as I looked over at Jasper. I was ready to cry from hearing his story, and yet he didn't seem worked up about it at all. Before I could say anything, he continued.

"Once the guys were caught, my family received a large settlement from them. Apparently, one of the robbers was rich and only stole because he was a kleptomaniac. My aunt kept the money until I turned eighteen, at which point she handed it over to me. It's more than enough to sustain me for the rest of my life and then some."

I decided it would be rude to ask him exactly how much he had received, though I was curious.

"I'm sorry about… your parents. Can I ask you something though?"

"Sure."

"Why is it you don't seem upset about your parents?" I immediately regretted asking the question, and hoped that he didn't get too offended.

"It was sixteen years ago, Edward. I've come to terms with what happened. Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die."

I snickered at his quote and he smiled as well.

"What about your parents?" he asked. I sighed at the question. I didn't like thinking about them, even though they had been nothing but caring.

"I haven't talked to them in a few years. We don't keep in contact." I hoped he would leave it at that, but luck was rarely on my side.

"Why's that?"

"I don't really want to talk about it," I murmured.

"That's fine," he replied as he moved to turn the radio on. I was grateful for distraction.

As we drove over the border between Washington and Oregon, I found my thoughts drifting back to what Jasper told me earlier.

I was having trouble understanding how someone who had gone through so much as a child could turn out to be the person that he was today. He seemed so sure of himself; he was confident and content, and seemed to know exactly what he wanted out of life. I wanted to ask him what his plans for the future were, but I didn't want to overstep any boundaries.

I also wondered how the money he received affected him. I would've thought that somewhat with enough money to avoid working would be immensely spoiled. But while Jasper's car was definitely nice, it didn't look overly expensive.

I snuck a look at Jasper and was absolutely astounded by what I saw. With the wind rushing through his blond hair and his vibrant blue eyes fixed on the road in slight concentration, he truly looked like an angel sitting next to me. I almost expected him to sprout wings at any moment.

"See something you like?"

Damn. Apparently the look I had intended to sneak turned out to be a full fledged stare. My face turned red and I turned my head down to stare at my lap.

I heard him chuckle but was too embarrassed to say anything. I leaned against the window planning to feign sleep, but soon enough I had actually fallen asleep.

I woke with a start, momentarily unaware of where I was. I remembered getting into Jasper's car this morning and heading off, but now I was in the car alone. I looked around and saw Jasper outside, leaning against the car while waiting for the gas tank to fill up.

I calmed my breathing and checked the clock. It was already past five; I had no idea why I'd slept that long.

"Sleep well?" Jasper asked as he got back in the car.

"Um, yeah," I responded, still a little bit embarrassed that I had not only fallen asleep, but had slept for something like four hours.

He flashed me his brilliant smile briefly before starting the car and turning to face the road ahead of him.

"Don't you get sleepy when you're driving for this long?" I asked. I had never actually driven for more than half an hour at a time. I didn't understand how someone could do it for this long and not get tired.

"Not really. The scenery keeps me busy enough."

His answer confused me. I couldn't imagine we had passed anything worth looking at yet. "We haven't passed anything that interesting though." I mentally kicked myself for saying that when I remembered that I had been asleep for the majority of the drive so far.

"It doesn't have to be some kind of spectacular view to be beautiful, Edward."

I didn't have a response to his answer, so I turned to look out the window to see if I could find the beauty that Jasper seemed to so easily find.

After five minutes of failing to see anything even remotely fascinating, I settled to getting lost in my own thoughts. Before I knew it, we were pulling up to a hotel.

As Jasper motioned for me to get out of the car, I wondered what the sleeping arrangements for tonight were going to be. Surely he wouldn't expect us to sleep in the same bed. Wow, was I having thoughts like that already?

I followed him inside and quickly realized that this was no ordinary hotel. It was an expensive one. Very expensive. I was pretty sure that the tiles on the ground were actually real gold and not just painted the same color.

"Jasper, isn't this hotel a little pricey?" I asked, my mind once again wandering back to the unasked question of just how much money he had received from that settlement.

He smiled at me but didn't answer my question. I watched as he walked up to the front desk.

"Well hello there Mr. Whitlock! The usual?" The receptionist said as she greeted him.

I think my jaw dropped to the floor. How often did you need to visit a hotel before you had a "usual" room? I wasn't sure I could afford one night here, let alone however many times Jasper had been here.

"Not tonight, Victoria. As you can see," Jasper replied, motioning over to where I was standing, "I have company this time around. Do you have any double suites available?"

"Anything for our best customer!"

Best customer? I didn't even want to think about what that implied. They chatted for a few more minutes before she handed him the room key. I followed him into the elevator with more than a few questions running around in my head.

"How many times have you been here?" I asked.

"I honestly couldn't tell you. I stay here every single time I travel, and I travel _a lot._"

"Wait, but this is a very upscale hotel. How can you possibly afford to stay here that much?

He looked confused as he answered my question. "I told you I got a lot of money from my settlement didn't I?"

"You did but..." Before I could finish my sentence the elevator door opened. If I had to guess, I would've said we were on the top floor. I followed him down the hall and watched as he went to open the last door at the end.

I thought I heard him murmur "Never seen the presidential suite here before" as he walked in. That couldn't be right though could it? Surely he wouldn't have gotten the most expensive room here.

I walked in and froze. It seemed he would and did get the most expensive room in the hotel.

"How… why… did…" I desperately tried to form a coherent sentence and managed an entire three words. Now I know I didn't do well in college, but come on.

"Edward, I could afford to stay in this room for the rest of my life if I wanted to," he said nonchalantly as he wandered around the room, quietly remarking to himself about one detail or another. "I don't typically splurge when it comes to money, but there's something special about this particular hotel."

I couldn't quite believe what he said, and I decided that I would hold off on asking him what he meant by his last statement.

"Well how much did you pay for tonight?" I asked while pulling my wallet out. I wasn't expecting him to pay for me and despite how expensive this hotel was, I still wanted to pay half the cost.

"You're not paying for anything on this trip," he said without turning to me, as if he somehow knew what I was planning.

"It's not fair for you to shoulder the entire financial burden by yourself, Jasper," I argued. I didn't even want to think about how much this would set me back, but I would've felt too bad just letting him pay for everything.

I was still watching him when he turned around. On his face I saw the saddest smile I'd ever seen. My heart almost broke just looking at him. "I've shouldered far greater burdens than this, Edward." With that, he went into the bathroom and turned the shower on.

I had every intention of asking him exactly what he meant by that but decided that I wouldn't try to push the subject tonight. As it is, that sad smile would probably haunt me in my dreams. I wondered what could have possibly happened to him. I mean, I knew about the incident with his parents, but I couldn't help feeling that something else was the cause of his sadness.

I changed into some comfortable sleeping clothes and headed over to lie down on one of the two gigantic beds. I was still trying to figure out how to start a conversation with Jasper about this when I heard him come out of the bathroom.

I propped myself up on my elbows so I could look at him. I opened my mouth to say something and was immediately stopped by the sight of Jasper coming out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel wrapped low around his waist.

He was easily the most gorgeous man I had ever seen in my life, and I figured I watched enough TV to be able to make that claim. His hair was still dripping as it clung to his forehead and just barely covered his eyes. His body looked like it should have been immortalized in paintings and statues and the like.

He was my definition of perfect. He obviously worked out but clearly didn't overdo it. I wondered if he knew just how good he looked. He was confident but not cocky, the way I imagined someone who looked like him would have been.

I tried turning my head away unsuccessfully and just settled for praying that he wouldn't notice me staring this time. Fortunately, he seemed preoccupied as he grabbed some clothes from his bag and went back into the bathroom to put them on.

I flattened myself out on the bed and tried to calm myself down before he came out. Just as I did, Jasper came out of the bathroom and stood next to the bed a few feet away from mine.

"Don't you want to take a shower?" he asked, removing the sheets from his bed so he could get in.

"No, I'll wait until tomorrow morning," I told him. I didn't want to get out of bed at all right now. I was incredibly tired despite my nap in the car earlier.

He chuckled and I asked him what he found so funny. "Nothing, I just knew you were going to say that."

I still didn't understand why that was funny but decided that I had more than enough on my mind already.

I was lost in my own thoughts when I heard Jasper say, "Hey Edward, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure."

"Why did you agree to come with me on this trip?"

I thought for a moment. I didn't really know the answer to that myself. I decided not to over think it and to just tell him the first thing that came to mind.

"I don't really know. You seem to know everything about me and I guess I just felt like coming with you would be good for me, that's all."

"Okay then, what do you hope to accomplish on this trip?"

He seemed to be prying for something; looking for some piece of information that I hadn't given him. I decided to play along for now. I didn't really have much to hide.

"Again, I don't really know. Maybe this will help me change for the better."

"Are you not content with your life right now? What do you want to change?"

His questions were starting to annoy me now. Not because he was asking them, but because they were making me think about my failure of a life.

I heard the faint sound of rain hitting the window. I turned my head and saw that it was indeed raining. I remembered Jasper telling me that rain was a symbol for change and realized that I had just told him that I had come on this trip in the hopes that it would help me change. I wondered briefly if this was some sort of sign but brushed it off.

I must have gotten distracted for quite a while because I heard Jasper clear his throat, reminding me of his question. I didn't want to deal with these questions right now.

"I don't know." I didn't believe for a second that he'd buy that as an answer, but I hoped that he would take it as an indication that I didn't want to talk anymore.

"Come on Edward, tell me," he implored.

I was a rather patient person, but I couldn't handle any more of this. I snapped.

"What do you fucking want me to tell you? That I hate my life? That I don't feel like I'm really even alive, that I just exist from day to day? That I'm a complete failure? If that's what you fucking want then there!"

Tears had started forming in my eyes while I was ranting but it wasn't until I had finished that I started sobbing uncontrollably. I hadn't noticed him move, but the next thing I knew, Jasper was sitting in my bed holding me tight against him. He cradled me in his arms until I calmed down.

"I… I want to live life the way you do," I managed to whisper into his chest. It was the truth.

I was drifting off quickly, comfortable in Jasper's arms. I wasn't sure, but I thought I heard him say "If you only knew." I wasn't even sure he had meant for me to hear that.

I was going to ask him about it but the comfort of him being so close to me was too much for me to handle. I fell asleep to the faint sound of the rain outside and the soft sound of Jasper breathing next to me.


End file.
